Ryan Gosling on 'Conan' Sept. 19.
Photo: Courtesy of Meghan Sinclair/Team Coco
This post needs a disclaimer: We're gross. Just for this one particular sliver of internet space for one particular moment in time, we're gonna get a little raunchy. OK, now that that's off our backs, whewwww. *adjusts sleeves, cracks neck* Let's get this par-tay started! So Ryan Gosling was on Conan last night, and wow. Wowwww. He looked, heh, dapper. *dabs sweat off forehead* He wore a light gray checkered two-button suit with a crisp white shirt, black skinny tie, and shined-up black shoes. And we were all, "Yayyy. Ryan. La dee daaaa," like every other girl when he walked on set. But then, Mr. Gosling sat down and our brains EXPLODED.
Balthazar Getty and Jared Leto rocking painted nails at Terry Richardson's studio.
Photo: Courtesy of Terry Richardson's Tumblr
Listen, sometimes Jared Leto just wears so much funky stuff within one week that we can't handle it, but because were a little, um, busy with New York Fashion Week we didn't have the time to stalk him like we usually do. Which is a lot. But don't worry—WE DIDN'T FORGET ABOUT YOU, JARED (Echelon, we haven't forgotten about you, either), we're just catching up on all his style haps and WHEW, BOY. We are mighty pleased with his clothing offerings as of late. First up: Jared Leto at Terry Richardson's studio this weekend. He's just hanging out with actor Balthazar Getty, all NBD in an oversized fedora, signature cutout tee, black aviators, and—our favorite part—black painted fingernails. Dudes rocking painted nails is kind of REALLY hot (as we've seen on our favorite Korean boy band Big Bang) and seeing them on Jared is no different. But this was just the WEE tip of the iceberg, friends. Please follow us into the Leto lair of style, where we can get lost in even MORE ensembles. Bwahahaha.
Taylor Lautner in the October 2011 issue of 'Seventeen.'
Photo: Courtesy of 'Seventeen'
It doesn't take much for Taylor Lautner to command our attention, especially when he's on the cover of a magazine (or looking like a TOTAL BABE in all those Abduction movie stills). Give us his searing stare or megawatt smile, and that's it, we're DONE. Lucky for us, we're living in a time when the fashion world loves Tay-Tay as much as we do. Thus, we must give props GAH-lore to Seventeen magazine for gifting us with Taylor Lautner in all his grinning, white teeth glory on the cover of their October issue. Not only do they tip us off as to who he's currently dating, they have quelched our post-summer blues with the most ADORBS photo outtakes. You can't just toss up shots of El Tay dressed like a lumberjack, clutching a football all smarmy-style, or hanging tough with a wolf-dog and not expect us to freak out, OK?
Pharrell Williams at the Palladium Boots "Tokyo Rising" screening.
Photo: Getty Images
Let's just put it out there—Pharrell Williams' style game is on LOCK. Like, he's found a way to perpetually never mess up any ensemble he throws on, and we THINK we might have figured out why. Pharrell doesn't try too hard! He just wears simple, well-fitted, comfortable attire everywhere, which makes him ooze confidence in a we-seriously-can't-even-handle-it kind of way. Case in point: Pharrell at his Palladium Boots Tokyo Rising screening this week in NYC. He kept his look easy peasy—he wore a crisp V-neck white tee, gray cardigan, distressed jeans, Chanel beaded necklace, black lace-up boots, and a fitted cap. And listen, we know we've seen this Pharrell look before (well, partially), but he was promoting his Palladium Boots-sponsored five-part web series called Tokyo Rising, where camera crews follow him around the city after the tsunami talking to artists about how the horrific event affected their lives. But, um, we have a little something to admit—we couldn't keep our eyes off Pharrell the wholleeee time!
Colton Haynes in "Wonderland Magazine."
Photo: Courtesy of Paul Jasmin/Wonderland Magazine
WHOA WHOA WHOA. Hold the phone, y'all. We know it's no surprise that Teen Wolf star Colton Haynes is a total babe, and after seeing his fashion-y side explode all over the pages of Bullett Magazine, we KNEW we were on to something. But we were not expecting this! Colton Haynes. In—what looks like—his jammies. In Wonderland Magazine. Yeah, yeah. We can stare at dudes ALL DAY in their skinny ties and well-fitted suits, but there's something about seeing a guy when he's just hanging around the house looking impeccably FIIIOONEE that just does us in. Like, if you dated Colton, he would look like this. All the time. His muscly muscles would be out in all their glory, and they'd glisten in the sunlight. GLISTEN. Siiigghhhh.
Taylor Lautner for VMAN.
Photo: Courtesy of Steven Klein/VMAN Magazine
Umm. Wow. Just... Excuse me, while I catch my breath. Because even though this is a greyscale image, I am totally cripplingly entranced by this visage of Taylor Lautner on the cover of VMAN. I mean, it's black-and-white, but there is just SO much angular face structure and glistening man-tensity (a hybrid of "man" and "intensity," obviously) and Tyra-approved SMIZE that my brain is exploding all over itself. Like, honestly, I CANNOT rip my line of sight from its current fixated gaze deep into those steely smoldering eyes, as if he's sending me telepathic messages in a foreign language - I hear it, but I don't understand... For this September Issue of VMAN, the "Archetype" issue, Taylor assumes the role of "The Idol," which is all very fitting since, I mean, who really looks like this?! Physics? Biology? What? Does not compute.
Shia LaBeouf's slow and steady beard growth.
Photo: Getty Images
So we were just perusing through Getty Images all la-dee-da, and then we came across a SUPPOSED image of Shia LaBeouf, aka the man in the bottom right corner of the above photo. And we were all, "WUT. WHERE DID SHIA GO? WHO STOLE SHIA'S IDENTITY?" because Mr. LaBeouf looked barely identifiable when he attended a screening in L.A. this weekend. First of all, his head is covered in RINGLETS. Like, there are curls cascading down his face—on Shia LaBeouf's face, nonetheless. And he has a beard! Not like, a nicely trimmed fashion beard, but burly man beard! Straight out of woodshop! WHERE DID THIS COME FROM? Last time we saw Shia he was makin' us all sweaty in his Details spread with his hair slicked back and his man muscles out in all their glistening glory. *fans self with hand* But even back then he was still sporting a mini beard. Where did this facial fiasco begin? And how has Shia kept us from noticing this huge transformation? Because, to be honest, we're kind of stalkery—especially when it comes to Shia. Let's investigate.
Joseph Gordon-Levitt covering Nirvana's "Lithium."
Photo: Courtesy of Jimerlin's Youtube Channel
As he starts off his set, Joseph Gordon-Levitt douses himself in a bottle of water, so he sits there with his guitar, glistening and sweaty. Excuse us, but to continue, we ALSO have to douse ourselves with water. Because we need a cold shower. So many cold showers.
There has been this blood-pressure-raising trend recently of really hot dudes doing really cool things. First Ryan Gosling proves he is a super-hero. And Bradley Cooper demonstrates his ability to speak other languages. But Joseph Gordon-Levitt not only is stealing our hearts in the most talked-about movie of all time, The Dark Knight Rises as the enigmatic John Blake, but he's also really really cool. And he makes his cultural savvy clear, beautifully covering Nirvana's "Lithium." His project HITrecord is all about recording and sharing music videos, and I think I speak for all women with eyeballs when I say there is no better accessory on a dude than a guitar. But JGL demonstrates, right here, what may be the most important article of clothing EVER owned by a man: The perfect, unflappable, undisputed T-shirt.
Joe Jonas guests on 'Bigger Than The Buzz'.
Sweet mother of Mickey Mouse. Howww can some singular human being be so EPICALLY adorable?! Riddle me that, world. I'd really like to know. Because Joe Jonas in his slick little graphic v-neck tee, scruffy chin, and gently smiling eyes doing a guest stint on MTV Buzzworthy's "Bigger Than The Buzz" is sending all my cuteness-reading meters off the CHARTS.
Josh Hartnett on the cover of "Corduroy."
Photo: Courtesy of "Corduroy" magazine
Holy smokes! Staring at this cover of Corduroy (and I mean STARING, dry gluey eyes, slack jaw, nerves taut and singularly attentive, THE WORKS), I'm overcome with so many...feelings. It's like I've just seen a GHOST, y'all! Or my war husband who I thought was killed in battle but unexpectedly returned after I accidentally fell in love with his best friend (lots of gold star stickers for your Trapper Keeper if you got the Pearl Harbor reference before I told you just now). It's just that Josh Hartnett has flown so far under the radar and paparazzi flashbulbs since those days I spent meticulously lining the inside of my locker with his white-tank-top-swaddled visage, I'm taken aback by all this MAN I see before me.