Dear Whoever Created This Louis C.K. One Tumblr,
You are my new favorite. I'd be comfortable leaving our correspondence at that, but since I'm also using this public platform to shoehorn you into my life as my new best friend, I should elaborate.
You are a genius. I'm not sure how this pun was never made until now, but somehow you beat everyone to it. For that, you deserve all the interwebs propers that bitcoins can buy.
Aside from the wordplay, you've combined three of my favorite things in this world—Louis C.K., Calvin Klein minimalism, and the '90s—into one masterpiece of a meme.
One Direction love exchanging gifts.
Photos: Getty Images, Photoshop: Maeve Keirans
Chances are good you're doing one of the following three things right now: 1.) getting your hands dirty in the kitchen helping prepare Christmas dinner, 2.) running around the mall picking up last-minute presents for those cousins you forgot were coming over, 3.) holing up in your room, eyeballs deep in wrapping paper and Scotch tape for the foreseeable future. Yea, us too. But we prepared a little light reading on the off-chance you need a momentary escape from your uncle's fishing stories or something to read on your phone as you tell your relatives you're catching up on "work emails." That's right, ladies and gents. It's a new installment of Fashion Fanfic (Christmas edition!) starring One Direction.
‘Twas the week before Christmas and all through the tour bus, four members of One Direction struggled to wrap their Secret Santa gifts. Liam was the only member tucked behind the velvet curtain in his bunk. He had picked up his final Secret Santa gift for Louis weeks earlier, so he went to sleep as the other boys scattered throughout the bus, trying to tape their last gifts closed.
One by one, the boys finished wrapping and set off to bed. They had a big day ahead of them: a sold-out show in New York City and the third and final day of their annual Secret Santa gift exchange. Secret Santa was something the boys had done since The X Factor. That first year, in 2010, they decided to do it to cheer each other up after getting the boot from the show. Even though their lives had changed dramatically since then, this was one tradition they still maintained.
Happy Holidays from Swagger New York.
Photo: Michele Moricci/Swagger New York
Didn't get to Olan Mills to take a traditional Christmas card photo this year? Don't worry! Swagger New York has got you covered. (And be honest: Did you really want to color-coordinate your outfit with your entire family anyway? I didn't think so.) Instead of sending out another perfectly posed pic, give your friends a holiday card they'll remember featuring a few of the year's pop culture moments we'll never forget.
Joe gets festive with a feline.
Photo: @joejonas' Instagram
We interrupt your viewing of Beyonce's self-titled visual album for a (less) important announcement: Joe Jonas posted a photo on Instagram and *GASP* he's ... BALD. And no, not like, buzz-cut bald. He's, like, the-before-shot-of-a-Hair-Club-for-Men-ad kind of bald. Has the stress of the JoBros breakup taken a drastic toll on the middle brother's follicles? Was he wearing a hairpiece all along? Is he a 40-year-old man IRL who lives at home with his mother and has fooled us all into thinking he's actually a 24-year-old pop star?! *pauses for dramatic effect* No! (PHEW.) None of the above, thankfully. Joe Jonas is just a jokester with some really great Photoshop #skillz.
The new icon collection from Memes On Clothes.
Photo: @themocbrand's Instagram
YASSS! Our prayers have finally been answered (and then some). We've been touting the genius of Yolo Polos ever since they first started stitching hip-hop memes on shirts, waaay back in August. After they paid tribute to Dada Drake (#DADALEAN), we put in a humble request for a Wheelchair Jimmy version. In September, we got an extended color palette, Jay Z's Dad Dive (#AWKWARDDIVE) and Miguel's Billboard Leg Drop—which, of course, we welcomed to the polo shirt fold with open arms. Sadly, Miguel's meme shirt was recently discontinued, but DRY YOUR EYES because the newly re-branded M.O.C. Brand now has FIVE new viral icons and one of them is—you guessed it—Wheelchair Jimmy. We're not sayin' we had anything to do with it, but... *flips hair*
Ahhh, Black Friday. The way retailers keep pushing it up earlier and earlier, you've likely been at the Black Friday grind for a few hours now. In that case, this little story might not help you. But if for some reason, we're catching you on your way out for your very first Black Friday ever, we have a few pieces of advice: dress for battle, keep your spirits high, and watch your back.
GETTING DRESSED AFTER THANKSGIVING DINNER IS HARD
IT'S OK, THOUGH, BECAUSE DRAKE SAYS SO
YOU'RE ABOUT TO EXERCISE ANYWAY, SORT OF
For most special occasions, especially dinners, there's an unwritten dress code that you should put forth a little extra style effort. Thanksgiving, on the other hand, is (in our opinion) and major exception. Maybe it's just because WE approach it like an Olympic sport (in over-eating), but as far as we're concerned here, vastly different rules apply.
HOW WE FEEL ABOUT STYLE MOST OF THE TIME:
Photo: Warner Bros./imgur
HOW WE FEEL ABOUT BODYCON FOR THANKSGIVING:
Celebrities being friends with other celebrities is nothing new. Look at Rihanna and Katy Perry. Or Cara Delevingne and Rita Ora. Or Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez. Or Beyonce and Gwyneth Paltrow. BFF matches made in star-studded heaven. Welp, it may be time to officially add another set of famous friends to that list: Kanye West and Anna Wintour. It seems their relationship is more than that one dinner date Ye keeps rapping about or that infamous baby name consult: Anna actually hauled her cookies (and Grace Coddington) to Brooklyn for the first New York stop of the Yeezus tour. We know very little about the fashion event outside of some blurry Instagram photos, which makes it PERFECT material for—you guessed it—the latest installment of Fashion Fanfic.
"Anna, couldn't we have waited until Saturday when he comes to Madison Square Garden? It's so much closer to work and home than... Brooklyn," Grace said while idly staring out the window of their town car at the traffic surrounding the Barclays Center.
"Absolutely not," Anna replied tersely while pushing up her slinking over-sized sunglasses (even though it was almost 7 p.m. and, y'know, dark out). "This is his first solo tour show in New York in five years. This is a historical event, and we must be in attendance."
Photo: Getty Images
Lady Gaga and Donatella Versace go way back. Like, all the way back to 2011, when Gaga borrowed a vintage Versace dress for her "Edge of Glory" music video. Flash forward two years later, and they're basically besties (and sometimes twinsies, depending on Gaga's wig du jour): they do lots of air kissing, they send each other extravagant flower arrangements and now, after Gaga penned an ode to Versace with her song "Donatella," rumor has it that Mother Monster is slated to be the face of the brand's spring 2014 ad campaign. Suddenly, there's a whole new meaning to the phrase "friends with benefits."
Obviously, the set of this potential shoot provides the perfect place for us to drop in for another installment of Fashion Fanfic. Because LBR: aren't you DYING to know what the two of them talk about?
“And zen I told her, ‘Jes! Of caars, of caars! It looks fabulous, it is amazing,’” Donatella explained to Gaga as the pair entered a cavernous London studio, arms linked. She exhaled a long drag of her cigarette and brushed a bleached blonde strand away from her face to survey the set. “Jes, this is fabulous.”
Gaga set down her meatball-inspired handbag (made to scale with real marinara) and beelined for the nearest garment rack (there were seven). “You know,” she started, “I just really want people to feel included in this ad, Donatella. I want this to be an all-inclusive ad. I want people to look at this ad and know that they’re not just looking at fashion or art—I want them to know that they’re looking at … a movement.”
Lady Gaga at 'Glamour' Magazine's Women Of The Year Awards.
Photo: Getty Images
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