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According to the internets it's National Splurge Day, which means, yep, we finally have an excuse to swipe up that Nyan Cat Ferrari we always wanted—JK, we'd totally buy clothes! To celebrate the occasion, we started doing some online shopping only to uncover tons of side-eye-worthy, super-expensive designer pieces that we just had to share with y'all. Basically, there's a lot of weird (and weirdly expensive!) shiz out there, people, and it's our duty to let y'all know about it. Onward!

FISH CLUTCH: $1,560
fish-clutch
Sure, this Olympia Le Tan clutch is hand-beaded and lined in gorgeous fabric, but carrying around a seemingly dead fish with creepy eyes and a gaping mouth is a pretty hard sell.

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Middle Finger

Put a bird on it (your body).
Photo: Nasty Gal/Larks Purlane/ASOS/Ali Express/Supreme/Gadgets and Gear/Cool Material/Ebay/Dr. Jay's

As I'm sure you've all heard by now, we are getting new emojis. We're getting over 250 new little icons to send to our friends, but, LBR, the only one anyone cares about is the middle-finger emoji. How many times a day do you wish you had a middle-finger emoji? For me, it's upwards of 10, probably. Starting in July, it will likely be the only emoji I ever send. To celebrate our excitement for the new/best emoji, we found the best middle-finger swag on the internet and rounded it up for your enjoyment.

Until we have a tiny hand flipping the bird on our phones, let's drape our body in this stuff.

Middle Finger

Photo: Asos

This Mickey Mouse-esque hand-print sweatshirt will let everyone know you are ready for a cartoon hand flipping people off in your life. You're so ready you're wearing a sweatshirt in June.

Middle Finger

Photo: Ali Express

If you want to wear these socks to work or school without being straight-up offensive to some people, you can hide them under boots. You'll know they're there but no one else will. TEE HEE.

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tupac-stan-swag

Only your credit card companies can judge you.
Photo: Etsy/40s & Shorties/Big Cartel

Happy birthday, 2pac! The iconic rapper (and Poetic Justice actor #neverforget) would've been 43 today. In honor of Tupac Amaru Shakur, we've rounded up some of the raddest tributes online. Everything from nail wraps, prints, and a Versace-inspired T-shirt in addition to finds that you might find in a swap meet. Happy birthday, Pac. You are missed.

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Kanye West, North West

SO QT.
Photo: @kimkardashian Instagram

Yesterday North West (aka #WORLDSMOSTTALKEDABOUTBABY) had her first birthday, and it looks like she's already taking after her dad in the fashion department. Not that we're surprised: North's ever-expanding wardrobe has been stocked with designer duds since she was only a few months old thanks to all of Kanye's designer friends. But this Father's Day, which coincided with her birthday, North showed off a new side of her steez that was less fancy and more functional. Kim Instagrammed North napping alongside Kanye in a cozy heather gray tee that matched her dad's, making our collective hearts melt. We still haven't gotten over how utterly adorable the photo is, but anytime there's matching, our brains automatically flips the "Who wore it better?" switch.

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Mule Emojis

Mules be everywhere.
Illustration: Joshua Covarrubias

The mule emoji has it rough. It's often overlooked as it sits next to the striking, bright red stiletto, which frequents exciting text messages like, "Just went shopping!!!" or "Let's go out, betches!!!" But IRL, the nude mule is actually super hot right now. The thick '90s peep-toe heel in a solid, neutral tone is making a serious comeback as the go-to warm-weather shoe, and we've got buttloads of proof. First up, a pair of nude mules from Topshop ($110) that look like an exact replica of the original emoji. (It's kinda freaky.) The coolest part? That heel is actually metallic gold! Urban Outfitters ($100) also carries a stacked wooden heel version, which is perfect for everyday use.

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Russell Westbrook

Russell Westbrook is v stylish, and soon, the whole world will know.
Photo: Getty Images

Unfortunately for those of us looking forward to another Heat v. Thunder accessories arms race, the Oklahoma City Thunder narrowly missed their chance to play in this year's NBA Finals—leaving those of us invested in the Western Conference (for reasons I won't get into on this platform) with the Spurs. (Listen, they're a great team, one of the greatest, most consistent of all time, don't get me wrong, but from the fashion side of things offer only this.) But for those of you who, like us, are pining for the days of yore, there's a silver lining. WWD reports that OKC point guard Russell Westbrook is teaming up with Barneys for a very special collaboration. So dust off your lensless glasses, folks. Russ is about to turn your closet UP.

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Drake, OVO

Let's appreciate Houston, y'all.
Photo: October's Very Own

Even though Drake is from Toronto—a fact we couldn't forget if we tried—he's shining the light on H-town this weekend with Houston Appreciation Weekend. And while Beyonce seems like a likelier host candidate for this kind of celebration considering it's (a) her hometown and (b) the inspiration behind her greatest unreleased song (IMHO) "Bow Down/I Been On," Drake has made the social centerpiece of this thing a pool party, which trumps all weirdness/confusion/side-eye I might have been harboring. I mean, who doesn't love a pool party? Anyway, we're guessing Bey would be proud of Drake's initiative. Also, there's merch.

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Gold Shoelaces

Would you pay $15K for these bad boys?
Photo: The House of Solid Gold

I don't have anything against rich people. I really don't. But when I stumble upon websites like House of Solid Gold and see they're selling shoelaces that are the same price as a car, thinking about whoever would buy them makes my right eye twitch. The e-commerce site is pretty self-explanatory: It takes everyday items and transforms them into all-gold masterpieces, and in theory, that's awesome. I've truly never seen a more badass set of nail clippers in my life, but the more time I spend on this site, the more and more insane depressing it becomes. So, I just had to share some of the craziest items with y'all. Tip: Don't look at your bank account before proceeding.

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karlie-kloss-warby-parker

Photo: Warby Parker

Karlie Kloss has a jam-packed schedule and résumé. Not only is she a Victoria's Secret model, a student at Harvard, an entrepreneur and chef (specializing in gluten-free cookies, natch), besties with Taylor Swift, and, NBD, a member of the House of Style family. Well, now you can add charitable eyewear designer to the mix.

Kloss has partnered up with Warby Parker, the eyewear retailer. Her collaboration with the sunglasses company includes six limited-edition styles. The three frames, each of which come in two colorways, retail for $145 ($195 with prescription), and are made of Japanese titanium frames.

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Summertime, aka "the season in which no garment is safe from a randomly missing piece of fabric," is officially here, y'all. Since cutouts made their resurgence back in 2010, designers have been trying to get a bit more, um, creative with the whole hole trend (heh), and it's officially gotten out of control. Now, we're not saying we'd never wear cutouts (we're not sweaty monsters, jeez), but here are some pieces that we'll very politely decline for the time being.

1. THE APPARENTLY-POCKETS-ARE-USELESS CUTOUT

Tip: Give these pocketless shorts to someone you hate because there's a 99% chance they'll end up with a broken iPhone and a case of the ugly cries.

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Featured Comment

I love these two as a couple. What a festive way to celebrate two important events in their life. Mariah looks like a dream.

Posted by Journey on Mariah Carey And Nick Cannon Shut Down Disneyland To Renew Vows In Cinderella-Themed Ensembles
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